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The Best Salesman in the World

30/7/2015

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Picture
A young guy from North Dakota moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job.

The Manager says, "Do you have any sales experience?"

The kid says "Yeah. I was a vacuum salesman back in North Dakota."

The boss was unsure, but he liked the kid and figured he'd give him a shot. So he gave him the job. "You start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."

His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down to the sales floor. "So, how many customers bought something from you today?"

The kid frowns and looks at the floor and mutters, "One".

The boss says "Just one?!!? Our sales people average sales to 20 to 30 customers a day. That will have to change, and soon, if you'd like to continue your employment here. We have very strict standards for our sales force here in Florida . One sale a day might have been acceptable in North Dakota , but you're not on the farm anymore, son."

The kid took his beating, but continued to look at his shoes, so the boss felt kinda bad for chewing him out on his first day. He asked (semi-sarcastically), "So, how much was your one sale for?"

The kid looks up at his boss and says "$101,237.65".

The boss, astonished, says $101,237.65?!? What in the world did you sell?"

The kid says, "Well, first, I sold him some new fish hooks. Then I sold him a new fishing rod to go with his new hooks. Then I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast, so I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department and I sold him a twin engine Chris Craft. Then he said he didn't think his Honda Civic would pull it, so I took him down to the automotive department and sold him that 4x4 Expedition."

The boss said "A guy came in here to buy a fish hook and you sold him a boat and a TRUCK!?"

The kid said "No, the guy came in here to buy tampons for his wife, and I said, 'Dude, your weekend's shot, you should go fishing.’ "

The ONLY things standing between you and success is that story you keep telling yourself as to why you can't achieve it!

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The Egg

8/7/2015

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You have died.
You were on your way home when you died.

It was a car accident, nothing particularly remarkable, but fatal nonetheless. You left behind a wife and two children. It was a painless death. The EMTs tried their best to save you but to no avail. Your body was so utterly shattered you were better off, trust me.

And that’s when you met me.

“What.. What happened?” You asked. “Where am I?”

“You died” I said, matter-of-factly. No point in mincing words.

“There was a.. a truck and it was skidding…”

“Yup.” I said.

“I.. I died?”

“Yup, but don’t feel bad about it. Everyone dies.” I said.

You looked around. There was nothingness. Just you and me. “What is this place?” You asked. “Is this the afterlife?”

“More or less.” I said.

“Are you God?” You asked.

“Yup.” I replied. “I am God.”

“My kids.. my wife,” You said.

“What about them?”

“Will they be alright?”

“That’s what I like to see,” I said. “..you just died and your main concern is your family. That’s good stuff right there.”

You looked at me with fascination.
To you I didn’t look like God. I just looked like some man or possibly a woman. Some vague authority figure, maybe. More of a grammar school teacher than the almighty.

“Don’t worry.” I said. “They’ll be fine. Your kids will remember you as perfect in every way. They didn’t have time to grow contempt for you. Your wife will cry on the outside, but be secretly relieved. To be fair, your marriage was falling apart. If it’s any consolation, she’ll feel very guilty for feeling relieved.”

“Oh,” You said. “.. so what happens now? Do I go to heaven or hell or something?”

“Neither.” I said. “You’ll be reincarnated.”

“Ah,” You said. “.. So the Hindus were right.”

“All religions are right in their own way,” I said. “.. walk with me.”

You followed along as we strode through the void.

“Where are we going?”

“Nowhere in particular,” I said. “.. It’s just nice to walk while we talk.”

“So what’s the point, then?” You asked. “When I get reborn, I’ll just be a blank slate, right? A baby. So all my experiences and everything I did in this life won’t matter.”

“Not so!” I said. “You have within you all the knowledge and experiences of all past lives. You just don’t remember them right now.”

I stopped walking and took you by the shoulders.

“Your soul is more magnificent, beautiful, and gigantic than you can possibly imagine. A human mind can only contain a tiny fraction of what you are. It’s like sticking your finger in a glass of water to see if it’s hot or cold. You put a tiny part of yourself into the vessel, and when you bring it back out, you’ve gained all the experiences it had.”

“You’ve been in a human for the last 48 years, so you haven’t stretched out yet and felt the rest of your immense consciousness. If we hung out here for a long enough, you’d start remembering everything. But there’s no point to doing that between each life.”

“How many times have I been reincarnated, then?”

“Oh lots. Lots and lots. An in to lots of different lives.” I said. “This time around, you’ll be a Chinese peasant girl in 540 AD.”

“Wait, what?” You stammered. “You’re sending me back in time?”

“Well, I guess technically. Time, as you know it, only exists in your Universe. Things are different where I come from.”

“Where you come from?” You asked.

“Oh sure,” I explained. “.. I come from somewhere. Somewhere else. And there are others like me. I know you’ll want to know what it’s like there, but honestly you wouldn’t understand.”

“Oh,” you said, a little let down. “.. but wait. If I get reincarnated to other places in time, I could have interacted with myself at some point.”

“Sure. Happens all the time. And with both lives only aware of their own lifespan you don’t even know it’s happening.”

“So what’s the point of it all?”

“Seriously?” I asked. “Seriously? You are asking me for the meaning of life? Isn’t that a little stereotypical?”

“Well it’s a reasonable question,” You persisted.

I looked you in the eye.
“The meaning of life, the reason I made this Whole Universe, is for YOU to mature.”


“You mean mankind? You want us to mature?”

“No, just YOU. I made this Whole Universe for YOU. With each new life YOU grow and mature and become a larger and greater intellect.”

“Just me? What about everyone else?”

“There is no one else,” I said. “.. in This Universe, there’s just YOU and ME.”

You stared blankly at me. “But all the people on Earth…”

“All you. Different incarnations of YOU.”

“Wait. I’m everyone!?”

“Now you’re getting it,” I said, with a congratulatory slap on the back.

“I’m every human being who ever lived?”

“Or who will ever live, yes.”

“I’m Abraham Lincoln?”

“I’m Hitler?” You said, appalled.

“And you are the millions he killed.”

“I’m Jesus?”

“And you’re everyone who followed him.”

You fell silent.

“Every time you victimized someone,” I said, “.. You were victimizing yourself. Every act of kindness you’ve done, you’ve done to yourself. Every happy and sad moment ever experienced by any human was, or will be, experienced by YOU.”

You thought for a long time.“Why?” You asked me. “Why do all this?”

“Because someday, YOU will become like me. Because that’s what you are. You’re one of my kind. You’re my child.”

“Whoa,” you said, incredulous. “You mean I’m a god?”

“No. Not yet. You’re a fetus. You’re still growing. Once you’ve lived every human life throughout all time, you will have grown enough to be born.”

“So the Whole Universe,” You said, “.. it’s just…”

“An egg.” I answered. “Now it’s time for you to move on to your next life.”
And I sent you on your way.

Story By: Andy Weir
[Adapted from http://www.lifecoachcode.com/2014/11/29/the-egg-this-story-will-blow-your-mind/]

Conclusion:
The feeling you feel right now...that’s your mind being blown. Elevated. You’ve Ascended to a whole new level.
Start questioning yourself “Can my mother, or my brother, my kid, my wife, my best friend, all be me?” Think of this when you talk with them.
You’ll start questioning things even more, “Can this sexy waitress, or Leonardo DiCaprio, or Gandhi, all those terrorists, politicians, soldiers who died in wars, my boss.. could all of them be really ME?”
And that’s ok!
Question. Question everything and everyone.
Start seeing the Universe through this prism. Start seeing the World and everyone in it with this eye.
Imagine if we all saw each other like this. As one.

So what if this is just a story?
It’s the story we believe in that matters. And maybe it’s time to change the old story and accept a new one. 
It’s not about which story is true. ALL OF THEM ARE.
It’s about which story makes YOU a more conscious person. A GOD.

P.S. When I think about it, YOU wrote this text for yourself.

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    Musings

    "If you don’t know the trees you may be lost in the forest, but if you don’t know the stories you may be lost in life."  
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